Hold on..

I'll be out of action for a few days - since I'm getting into some work (for a change, as you would already know)

In the meanwhile, you may want to go through this initiative by few friends of mine (Click Here to read, or right click to save)

..and the fitting reply to the confessions...

Dear Pers-:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard tobelieve that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.

(Thanks T, for your help on this post)

Of Parties and Paranthaas..

Let's talk about impish M. I haven't known M for a very long time (an year and a half is not very long, right?), but I can predict her actions to such precision that it should make her a very close acquaintance of mine.

Just the other day, I was telling her about our core group (nah, not the intricacies, but more about what friend circles mean) – I was telling her that we (and by we I mean our group comprising of A, B, S, S, G, B and the likes..) have a sense of celebration which is not exactly dependent on the number of beer cans rolled out, or the glasses of Brahmos (you don't know about Brahmos? I'll dedicate a post to it later..), or for that matter the numbers of hours spent dancing after being completely bamboozled – the common string that ties people together is the sense of being together, even when far; the state of Unagi (!! – you don't watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S kya?), which is total awareness of things happening around you; the sense that we might choose to travel all the way to Murthal to have those unbeatable paranthas (with that connoisseur-like white butter and the never ending topping provided by Lassi!), rather than shadowing towards TC or Purple Haze to gulp down a few pints.

Infact, I was talking to P the other day when she just mentioned that there are two people in this world that she can even die for, both of them being her friends – I found this statement very puzzling, and I did have a lengthy argument with her on the same (okay, I understand that this post is for M, so I'll talk about his incident when I mention P in a separate post).

So, M is someone I would call a-22-year-old-wannabe-grown-up, who believes that life starts with the adolescence, and ends by the time you start having kids (not really, but in essence – because her consideration set ends very close to herself). She doesn't even venture to fourth degree of separation to take people into her consideration set, and hence most of her deductions are very skewed. She lives in a world where quitting smoking is the hardest thing to do, and the best way of treating friends is to call them on a party.

M believes that priorities are decided then and there, in the spur of the moment, and it is not something that should be upfront – because then you can play around with the case at hand. I find this a possible way of easing out in some cases, but this can land you in big-time troubles, as and when the time arises.

I must say, M has a wonderful predelection of awesome things – the other day, she took us to this spectacular place which one can not imagine to be in the boundaries of Delhi. I swear, if I go to that place and get lost one day, there's no point coming after me – I would have had multiple heart attacks out there – and as they say, meri laash cheel kauwey kha chuke honge! (my corpse would have fed kites and crows)! You spend a couple of hours there, and you don't need to travel all the way to Chambal to see all the plateus and valleys (and maybe the ghosts and daakus a.l.a pirates).

I do not know many people who are as fond of F.R.I.E.N.D.S as I am (if not more attached to..) - however, I know that M will beat me to a quiz on F.R.I.E.N.D.S quiz hands down! I wonder if she passed out of Lincoln High. And another thing I have a gut feel is that she could as well write "Woman Undone", as much like Rachel could.

Though she lives, eats and sleeps in the imaginary world of 'Central Perk', I guess she understands that real life is not even close to reel life.

Now that M has gone through some testing times, and still has some challenges ahead of her, I'm sure she'll really GROW UP! Won't she?

Amen!

Am I old enough..

Just the other day, I was thinking of how things are with my bro, and I got the perfect fodder to plug in here. Do we realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five!

That's the key.

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21.... YESSSS !!! (I know that - my bro just turned 21)

But then you turn 25 (I am 25)....then 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk. He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40.

Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 . . and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime.

And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!


HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1.Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay "them"

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. " An idle mind is the devil's workshop."

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, Whether it's family, pets, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to hills outside the city; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER THE "EVER-REPEATED" ADAGE:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.